If you are like me and have a toddler, I feel your pain. Those of you who have raised your children into teens or even adults now, I applaud your strength and patience (whats your secret?). Nothing about this parenting thing is easy and unfortunately, kids don’t come with an instruction manual.(it would be helpful to have some sort of a guide on what the F I’m supposed to be doing.) As for the parents like me, feeling like they are completely winging it, and quiet possibly doing it all wrong…you are not alone. Not even close to alone…
Each child has their own unique emotions and personalities, but they for a generalization can be categorized in four different personality types: Emotional and Controlling(Type A), Logical and Controlling(Type B), Emotional and Not Controlling(Type C), and Logical and Not Controlling(Type D).
TYPE A: They are typically very good with being in a leadership role, confident, decisive, and very motivated. Downfalls being that they can be Bossy, demanding, need to be correct always, argumentative, manipulative, and selfish
hints to help when parenting this type~
- speak to them logically
- be specific and direct
- encourage their intelligence
- allow them to make decisions
- Lecture them
- limit their emotions
- be authoritative
- embarrass them in front of others
TYPE B: Very compassionate, loyal, well-behaved, and easy to discipline. traits of theirs that are a bit more difficult how critical they can be, get frustrated very easily, extremely sensitive, and moody/emotional.
Helpful for parenting this type~
- Be sensitive
- make them feel secure
- show them they are appreciated
- promote their creativity
- guilt trip
- expect spontanity
- demand perfection
- expect forgiveness
TYPE C: very good at being the peacekeeper, accommodating, not demanding, comfortable when alone, little drama. Some of the more difficult traits being resentful when feel pressured, uncomfortable in social situations, and doesn’t complete tasks.
hints for parenting this type:
- be mindful of how you come across while criticizing, dont be too harsh.
- listen to them
- accept them for what makes them unique
- be cruel or insensitive
- expect them to be social
- demand them to conform
TYPE D: Love life, accepting, “social butterfly”, loves hugging and expressing love, extremely inquisitive and easily adjusts to new situations. Some Downfalls of this personality type being their sass, defiance of authority, selfishness, and tease others.
hints for parenting this type~
- be positive
- show praise
- encourage their creativity
- allow them to verbally express emotions
- be overly serious
- ignore them
- demand perfection
- consume their time
my sassy little Sky
Although each child is unique and has their very own personality and each personality type has its good points and bad point, but one thing all toddlers do the same is, drum roll….TANTRUMS. every parents worst nightmare yet completely inevitable and unavoidable. Tantrums are completely natural and normal for toddlers and it is simply their way of expressing intense emotion. A few things that may help you get through the tantrums without losing all your marbles:
- Don’t talk- they are in no place mentally to think logically
- Stay calm- as frustrating as the tantrum its self is, the only thing to do is try your best to keep your cool.
- DO NOT GIVE IN! i repeat do not give in! – giving in only encouraging the behavior and showing that it in fact worked. Don’t do this or else the tantrums will never end! i warned you.
- Do not show anger- they cant help it, they need to express how they feel, try and remind yourself this.
- Let it run its course- this is really all you can do, they need to get all the built up or overwhelming emotions out.
As for the people without kids who glare, judge, or think my child is out of control. instead of looking at me like I’m a bad mom, understand by letting my child throw her tantrum I am actually being a good parent (trying to be), I’m not neglecting her needs or ignoring her emotions. I am simply allowing it to run its course.